This is our story....of love, life, and adoption

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

40 minutes



I got 40 whole blissful, wonderful loving minutes snuggling with my little angel tonight. She normally doesn't do that(except when she was sick). She's usually running all over the place, not giving us a mere second to sit down.
I've always felt that Claire bonded very well to us..but I've seen such strides in her trust of us over the last several months. I'm not sure what I was expecting. I guess I didn't realize that I would still be seeing measurable moments this long into her being home with us. I mean I knew that it was a process, a process that took time. Maybe it was my naivety. Maybe it was that after such a long struggle to have a family I didn't care what it took or what hurdles we had to go through as a family as long as we had our complete family. I just figured we would handle what ever problems or struggles we/she had and that was it. But truthfully I don't think I really thought that after being home this long I would notice anything that any other non adoptive parent would notice(***by the way she's been with us now longer then she was in the orphanage***) But tonight was one of those moments that seemed pretty significant to me. Aside from the time when she was sick and would cuddle, she really wasn't much of a cuddler. When it's time to go to sleep, she never liked being rocked. She liked her routine..stories, prayer bear, music, crib. And I was okay with that, I figured maybe that was just her. But tonight, so peaceful, she laid on my chest, calm, passive, and we just talked and laid there. Then it hit me..this was a MOMENT. Wow..really she wanted to love on me. So I didn't move and just soaked it all in. Jon got up and I told him what happened and so as I turned around Jon was lying on the couch...what...he was supposed to be getting ready for work...
what are you doing?
I want that..I want her to cuddle with me...
So I tried to lay her on Jon's chest...
Nope she didn't want it.
I picked her up and again she just snuggled into me..that's when I knew for sure. Tonight was my MOMENT...tonight was about Claire and me.....

5 comments:

Tisra said...

OH ANN!!!! Such a sweet blessing- and that you were cognizant of it right then allowed you to soak it up, breathe it in, and store it in your memory bank to relive for ages. Ahhhhh. Congratulations on living your dream, Mommy.

Tisra
http://lifetrain.blogpsot.com

The Family K. said...

Lovely! Not having snuggly children ourselves, I know what you mean about soaking up those moments when they come. I'm glad it lasted as long as it did, and moreso, glad for what it signifies.

PIPO said...

Ahhhh....the moments to savor.

Debbie and Brian said...

Thank you for sharing your wonderful moment,,,you guys should be proud parents! I had tears in my eyes reading your moment--you must of have this OVER the top feeling inside!! I love hearing the stories of the struggles and the moments when things starts coming together for the child/mother/father-- it does comfort the fear for waiting families! I think we (mothers), we can't stop thinking about, is she going to bond with me, or if she going bond with daddy and have nothing to do with me, etc... Thanks for sharing!

David and Janalee said...

Ann, That is the sweetest thing ever! I remember moments like this well and guess what! They still happen even two years plus home. She is getting so big! I love the beach shots above but your story in this post melts my heart...and my mascara!
Love you!
Janalee